Things everyone should know about Dorchester!

2002 facts

  1. In stark contrast to the facts of 2001, Dorchester is now in fact considered the worst place in the UK to pull (according to the Newcastle Metro). I guess it depends on the viewing perspective of the statistics. So whilst the county town is the place to be if you're a single male over 70 (see 2001 facts), the prospects are not so hot for the pre-pension drawing ladies: Hardly any available men, and all those randy grannies to contend with over them...!
  2. Madonna has bought a house on the Wiltshire border and is apparently often seen in the local pub

2001 facts

  1. Guys - Dorchester is THE place to pull, apparently! We have the highest ratio of available females to males in the country! (But what they don't tell you in the papers: your best bet for netting a hot date is one of the old people's homes; most of the aforementioned females are 'available' simply cos they've outlived their husbands!)
  2. 2001 Christmas lights - Dorchester was voted by the Daily Mirror as having the worst christmas light in the country!! I didn't realise those sparse strands of plain white bulbs were actually christmas decorations, but at least it's saving taxpayers' money!! And the risk of death-by-falling-decorations is dramatically reduced in comparison with the more ambitious projects of other towns: To quote an ex-Dorchester resident "Quite traumatising today in Oxford- some of the Christmas decorations fell off their hooks and somebody has ended up in hospital after being hit by a falling star. Horrible, just proves why Christmas is deadly." (Purkiss, J. C., (2001))
  3. World Heritage Site - Yes, the Dorset coast has recently been granted World Heritage status, ranking it equal in importance with the Great Barrier Reef and the Grand Canyon! How exciting!! (Can't wait for the grockle invasion...
  4. Dorchester is soon to be left with just one nightclub (if that's what it should be called) as stings/liberties/the buzz (depending on how old you are!) is about to close it's doors for the last time to be turned into flats! As Neil rightly pointed out, Paul's does not have the capacity to cope with all those single grans out on the pull (see point 1)), so we may have to venture outside the happening nightlife scene that is Dorchester, in search of other clubs...

More recent facts

See James's page of facts on DTHS98, which is updated far more often than this!